with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
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