people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
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