i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
