so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
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