quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
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