hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
420 ftw
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
Someone shattered a urinal.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
