You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Why do I fail so hard at ironing, when I'm a woman and i should be amazing at it?
because god found you far too good at oral sex and had to make all things even?
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
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