her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
