Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Randomize
