wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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