Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
How's work?
Spinning.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Randomize
