u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
The Olympian is in my bed
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
