Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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