summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink