fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door