Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Randomize
