I wish I could punch you in the face.
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Randomize
