i just made my gag reflex go away.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.