The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
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