It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
