His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
