we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
I'm like, not good at living.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
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