Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
well I can't set my house on fire every night
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
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