I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
