We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
I have aggressive nipples.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
