LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
