Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
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