smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize
