please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
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