she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Randomize
