"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
