Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
it's like that moment that you're driving and realize you're lost except instead of driving i'm just sitting here in my living room drunk, eating a plate of sausages, drinking red wine and just thinking "i'm going to be 28 this year. i know people who are married, with beautiful and well behaved children. where was the wrong turn?"
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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