He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
Randomize
