2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
tell me about the fingering
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