Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
i love accidental penises.
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize
