bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Randomize
