Don't you send me to vm
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Randomize