well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
false alarm, still single
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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