I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
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Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
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He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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