I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
