is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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