They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Randomize
