come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
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