I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize