yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
soo... how was my night?
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
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