i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Randomize
