So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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