Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
