Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
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