Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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