lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize