i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Randomize
