need another drink. this is the easiest way
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
Randomize
