Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Randomize
